As I’ve mentioned, I’ve been working with a nutrition coach, none other than the amazing Carter Schoffer of Body Transformation/Precision Nutrition. In the report that I send to him weekly, one of the questions he asks says something like, “On a scale of 1 – 10, how much effort are you putting forth? 10 means you are functioning at maximum capacity.” I immediately went to mark down a “10” (obviously) but found myself hesitating…
The definition for ‘maximum’ is: The greatest quantity or degree reached or recorded; the upper limit of variation.
The definition for ‘capacity’ is: Ability to perform or produce.
Hmmm. Am I functioning at maximum capacity? If I’m being honest, no. While I train hard, there have been many times that I’ve been in the weight room and definitely had it in me to lift a little heavier but I decided not to. There have been mornings that I’ve cut my morning walk short, just because. There have been days that I’ve been lazy and haven’t eaten enough veggies, drank enough water or tossed back a handful of chocolate. Don’t get me wrong – I try hard! But trying hard is very different than trying your absolute best. Trying your absolute best means that there is not one single additional thing you could have done more of, or differently, to possibly make the results more desirable.
I realize that the original question Carter posed was in regards to my training and dietary intake, however this little question prompted me to apply it to many different aspects of my life. I started thinking about my job, my friends, my family, my studying, my faith…
Am I being the best business owner possible? Am I being the best friend & family member that I can be? Am I doing my best to learn new information every single day in various fields?
No, no, no, and no.
If you got fired from your job tomorrow, would you have peace in knowing that you did every single thing possible to make it a booming success?
If the love of your life came up to you tomorrow and broke it off forever, would you find comfort in knowing that you made each and every attempt to be the best partner you could be for them?
I was slightly shocked when I came to this revelation. I’ve always taken pride in “trying hard”. Now I’ve realized that “trying hard” isn’t going to cut the mustard. Trying hard isn’t going to get me to where I want to be – not with my career and our company, not with my physique, not with my family & friends, and not with The Big Guy upstairs.
I was training two nights ago and while I was lifting I started whining to myself in my head thinking how heavy it felt and how I was tired. Then I remembered Carter’s question and asked myself, “Are you trying your absolute best?” Um, no, I wasn’t; not even close. I snapped out of it, added some more weight and finished my sets. Do your best.
Now, I realize that we can’t all function at maximum capacity in every arena of our lives every single day. But if you are being honest with yourself, there are definitely areas that you can improve in if you really want to see results. If somebody asks me, “Are you doing your absolute best with ______ ?” I want to be able to answer with an emphatic YES! Do your best.
Let me tell you what I don’t want you to envision when you ask yourself, “Is this your best?” I don’t want you to think about that crotchety old tee ball coach that you had when you were 5 years old that sarcastically barked out, “Is that the best ya can do??” when you swung like a dickens at the ball with all of your might with what you were certain was laser-like precision and were utterly devastated (and surprised) when you missed.** No, no. I want you to imagine leaning in, looking yourself in the eyes and, with an expression of care and concern, asking yourself, “Is this your best?”
Doing your best will mean something different for everybody. For me it means no more sneaking extra nut butter, thinking it doesn’t count. It means taking the time to do my mobility and stability work pre-training even though I admittedly find it to be the most boring thing on planet Earth. It means telling Michael how handsome I think he is even when I assume he already knows, reading my Bible, calling my grandmother more frequently, and telling my family I love them even if it embarrasses them. It means doing my last two sprints because contrary to what I sometimes tell myself, they do make a difference.
I don’t expect to be perfect… but I do expect my best.
**I played tee ball, and am clearly scarred for life.
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25 Comments
Anonymous
March 29, 2012 at 6:33 pmI find your blog really inspiring, but I do have a problem reading sometimes 'cause of the white text on black background.
Cheers
Jen Comas Keck
March 29, 2012 at 6:35 pmFirst, thank you!
And thanks for the feedback. Funny you mention it, because I was previewing this very post today thinking, "This is awful on the eyeballs to read!" You see, I accidentally wiped my blog template out the other day and was forced to do my best to recreate it and I obviously failed. haha! Soon it will be the dark grey color it used to be so please bear with me 😉
Anonymous
March 29, 2012 at 7:45 pmJen, you are such an inspiration. Thank you.
There are times in my day to day life when I do things that are completely out of character of me. I sit back and think about what I could be doing to not only better myself, but others around me. I kid you not. I think 'What would Jen do'?
I love your energy.
Thank you for encouraging me to always be better!
xoxo
Jes
Jen Comas Keck
March 29, 2012 at 9:05 pmJes –
you, my dear, could not have possibly said more powerful words to me. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart. I strive to set such a good example, and there are so many days that I feel like I have failed and I stress myself out about it. Helping people be better is my purpose.
Thank you for making my day!
Tara @ Sweat like a Pig
March 30, 2012 at 7:21 amI loved this post, Jen. It's so nice to know that you're not perfect, yet you constantly push yourself. I can absolutely relate to everything you said, and I often question myself whether I'm pushing myself as hard as possible. You're such an inspiration to me 🙂
Anonymous
March 30, 2012 at 10:57 amJen,
First, thanks for your blog!
Here's a question for you… what do you do when you've lost some of that edge…. when you kinda sorta really don't care all that much if it's your best? When you feel so tired and beat down (and I'm not just talking overtraining here, I'm talking training, injuries, work, relationships…). How do you get from feeling like you're doing ok and that's good enough, back to being hungry and alive and thriving and clawing your way through? I DID have that drive before, but honestly I'm in a longer-than-is-ok clip of being mediocre. Do you have any tips for people in that space?
Trish
March 30, 2012 at 10:57 amWhat an inspiring read! There are definately areas in my life I need to work on…. Starting right now! Thanks!
Anonymous
March 30, 2012 at 10:57 amgreat post jen…timing was perfect as well, i was on the treadmill today, hill sprints, and after 10, thought, okay that's good, then thought "hell no", you got 5 more in you!! amazing when you really think about whether or not we are giving our best, but today, i can honestly say i did :)….
erin
Diana Davis
March 30, 2012 at 10:58 amThe thing is, the "is this your best" thinking can really backfire for some girls. I have body dysmorphia, and the mirror, "is this our best" thing doesn't work for me. In fact, I didn't even KNOW how skewed my self-vision was until it got out of control. I HAD been overweight, and lost it by joining Weight Watchers and a gym. I went from looking fit and wonderful to 93 lbs of bony ickiness. I discovered a love of strength training, but it mutated. I went from eating healthfully and exercising well to eating barely anything, purging it up, and marrying myself to a freakish workout routine. But I would look in the mirror and say "is this your BEST?" Since I couldn't see reality, the answer was rarely right. Oddly, I got hit on a LOT by a certain type of guy when I looked like a balloon on top of a drying rack.
OF course, my body, after several years of abuse, rebelled. No matter what, it wanted fat…so I ate less and worked out HARDER and purged MORE, and kept putting on fat. My family mostly knew, but my mother was in denial (she has her own issues-coffee for lunch!) my sister tried to get her to help me and gave up when Mom insisted on living in la la land, and my husband let fear of me being angry stop him from saving me. Really, I nearly died. I had a near heart attack from lack of electrolytes. My arm went dead one day T WORK. UTTERLY DEAD. FINALLY, I GOT MYSELF HELP. Trust me, recovery was not fun. I quit purging cold turkey. The year of very rapid fat gain while I learned to eat more is the most humiliating thing I have faced. My clothes don't fit. My Achilles' tendon has disappeared. Even though I can lift more than any woman I know, and have increadible endurance, I am ashamed of how I look and what I did to myself.
I am stronger now, I can lift more. But I am actually STILL working on eating enough calories to support my work out routine. I may be #1 woman in terms of strength and cardio at my YMCA, but a lot of women who wave around 5 lbs once a week and ellipticize half an hour a day look better. They probably eat more, too.
My body isn't working right, so it may be a long time before I get back in physical shape and lose this spare fat. Every day, I regret my insanity, which probably came from childhood problems rather than anything to do with food or fitness. Recovery not only meant fat, but digestion issues, thryoid problems, dental problems, headaches and sleepless nights. Society didn't do it, magazines didn't do it, fashion magazines didn't do it. I did it to myself. In truth, I imagine there are people out there who would be happy looking the way I do now. Who knows? I can't see it.
I agree, you should do your best, but for me, I did my best to do myself in. It wasn't worth it,
Haley @ Climb Run Lift Mom
March 30, 2012 at 10:58 amGreat post. I know I don't always try my hardest either :/ That's something that needs to change soon.
Jen Comas Keck
March 30, 2012 at 12:01 pmHey Tara! Ohhhh I am far from perfect and I have to give myself reality checks constantly. Thank you for your kind words! Hopefully if I get to London you and I can get together and train! I'll bring my Bosu. 😉 hahaha!
Jen Comas Keck
March 30, 2012 at 12:04 pmHi Jaime!
I definitely go through those periods as well. Speaking for myself, that is usually a sign that I need to switch things up. Different foods, different training, or even just step back and take a break. Go shop, spend time with friends and focusing on doing what I love as opposed to what I "should be doing" is so good for the soul! 😉
Jen Comas Keck
March 30, 2012 at 12:06 pmHi Haley!
I totally understand. I think realizing that we aren't giving something our all is a huge part of the solution!
Jen Comas Keck
March 30, 2012 at 12:14 pmDiana,
Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for sharing your story. I pray that other women that are in the same boat you were in see your story and are able to relate and get help. I'm so sorry that you went through that (and continue to deal with this), but I'm so grateful you got help. I can't begin to imagine the emotional roller coaster that this journey has been for you.
I absolutely agree that the "Is this your best?" can not be applied towards body image. That is a setup for disaster and disappointment. I apologize if this post read that way because it certainly wasn't my intention. I don't recommend that anybody strive for perfection, I merely want to encourage people to do their best in any area in their life that is lagging. For me, this ranges from my marriage, to my friendships, to my business, to my faith.
I have often been disappointed with my sub-par results in certain areas, but looking back in hindsight I've realized I hadn't done my best so how could I complain about it? Again, this isn't geared towards body image, but I can see how it could read that way for somebody that has dealt with what you have.
Thank you for courageously sharing your story and for taking the time to comment.
Jen Comas Keck
March 30, 2012 at 12:28 pmMy pleasure, thank you for reading!
Ahhhh the doldrums. I am familiar with this feeling. I go through these periods too and I have found that it helps to do some soul searching. Journalling is a huge blessing for me and it's something I've done since I was 5 years old! (Hello Kitty Diary. Hey hey!!) What is truly important to you? What do you feel passionate about? Where do you want to be in 3 months, 6 months, a year, 5 years, and what do you need to get there? Those are some questions to ask yourself.
I have also found help in reading some books. Have you read The Happiness Project? It is my #1 recommendation for you, and everybody else. That book changed my life. It's focus is on finding happiness, which is unique to everybody.
http://www.jencomaskeck.com/2012/01/book-review-happiness-project.html
If all of this fails, I suggest meeting your best girlfriends and taking a road trip. Does the trick for me every time! 😉
You have just inspired a new blog post for me! So thank you for that!
Jen Comas Keck
March 30, 2012 at 12:29 pmAhhh, Erin! This is music to my ears and I swear you described what could have been me. After 8 – 10 sprints I often think, "Eh, that's good." even what I know I could give it all I've got by doing a few more.
(as long as it's smart and not crazy – like doing 25 more!)
Have a great weekend!
Jen Comas Keck
March 30, 2012 at 12:29 pmThanks Trish! Enjoy the journey and your weekend!
Anonymous
March 30, 2012 at 1:31 pmThanks so much for the response!
Journaling… Ha. I think my first one had rainbows and a little gold lock. 🙂 If only I had stayed consistent with it! 🙂 Starting up again has actually been in the back of my mind for some time because I think it would hold me accountable to myself a little more and would help me to actually think things thru and make some plans instead of being lazy-minded and settling in my unhappiness, so it's good to have you nudge it back to the fore. Thanks.
Haven't read that book, but I'll check it out.
Girly, I have enough issues to inspire at least a good 6 mos' worth of blog posts! So hit me up if you ever have writer's block! 🙂
Thanks again!
Jaime
March 31, 2012 at 1:36 pmGood timing on this article! I have found myself looking back on March, asking this quesion, and come up with the same answer – I have not done my best. I am struggling to find what it will take to get over this "wall" I have encountered.
Anonymous
April 2, 2012 at 12:40 pm"Society didn't do it, magazines didn't do it, fashion magazines didn't do it."
Although you went through the 'actions' of doing it I believe there is a LOT of blame to be put on upbringing and our society.
Ritchie
April 2, 2012 at 3:44 pmWhat I DO know is that when it comes to being my (and Tinas) nutrition coach you're doing a fantastic job and I couldn't begin to imagine that you could do a better job. I know we are nearing the end of our intial 12 weeks and am already looking forward to the next 12 weeks !!
Anonymous
April 8, 2012 at 11:08 pmJen, I am new to the weighlifting world. I used to be a cardio junkie, but the past couple months, I've put in lots of hours in the weight room. Within the past few days, I've decided that for my next training cycle, I want to start power lifting. Watching videos of you lifting are so inspiring it is unreal to me. It makes me excited to get into the gym every day as I think to myself "Damn.. she's awesome. I want to be able to lift like she does eventually.." So know that you're making a difference. This post honestly just makes me want to get in the weight room and give it everything i have every day to make it where i want to be. Thank you so much for giving me the motivation I've needed.
Yours truly, Shelby
Jen Comas Keck
April 9, 2012 at 1:45 pmHey Shelby!
Thank you so much for the kind words. Hearing things like that make my day and motivate me to work even harder and spread my reach further!
Good luck in powerlifting and warning- it's addictive! 😉 Keep me posted on how it goes!
Jen Comas Keck
April 9, 2012 at 1:45 pmThanks Ritchie!
You guys have been great clients so it's made my job pretty easy! 🙂
Ines Subashka
July 2, 2012 at 8:19 amGreat post! I think everybody knows this, but somehow we forget it, so thank you for the reminder! 😉