Dear diary inspiration

Lessons I learned in 2011

As each year winds down I always look back in amazement.
There are always the things that happen each year that shock me; like my moving from my beloved bright-lights-big-city-life to the sticks, the confusing public acceptance of Snuggies or the fact that I marched into a 5-star salon and purposefully asked for highlights with 6 inches of dark roots showing .
There are the things that I was certain would happen but never did; like our house getting swept away Wizard-of-Oz-style in the awful tornado season that pummeled the southeast back in April. I spent countless nights pacing the house at 3am watching the weather channel, listening for the tornado sirens and begging my husband fervently for a storm shelter for Christmas.
However, the things I ponder the most are the many lessons I learned. Ohhhh goodness the things I have learned! Nobody is as good of a teacher as Ol’ Father Time himself. Many things can be taught in a classroom but most of the things that we need in order to get through this crazy thing called life are up to us to figure out through my favorite process (not at all) called “Trial and Error*”.
*I’m really good at the error part.

In no particular order…

Life is short – wear my fancy pants. 
Every day is a special occasion so use the good china, wear your fanciest lingerie, douse yourself in your best perfume… well, you get the picture. When I was a little girl, I got my first little bottle of perfume. It was Strawberry Shortcake perfume and I treasured it. I kept it on this special little shelf in my dresser and only opened it to sniff it. I’d never put any on because I didn’t deem any occasion worthy enough and I was scared to waste it. I’m sure this will be a shocker, but Strawberry Shortcake perfume wasn’t exactly the highest quality and after a few months it smelled awful, like rubbing alcohol. I never wore it, it went to waste and I was devastated! I should have let myself enjoy it. I don’t save anything like that now because I’ve realized that every day is worthy of the best! If I die tomorrow, I will have the peace of knowing I got appropriate wear out of my (highly impractical but gorgeous) 6 inch purple velvet shoes that I bought on my most recent trip to Vegas. A question I’ve always gotten asked over the years but even more so while living in the boonies where sweatpants seem to be the state uniform is, “What is the special occasion?” after they look at my outfit.
What is the special occasion? Well, I’m alive and that is occasion enough!

Phytos > Macros.
I’m talking nutrients. Out are the days of talking about calories and now the hot topic that everybody wants to discuss are macros.
“What are your macros, brah?” 
(In case you don’t know, “macros” are short for macronutrients and refer to protein, fat and carbohydrate.) I can tell you exactly how many grams of protein, carb and fat my husband and half of the guys at the office are consuming daily…but how often are vegetables or phytonutrients mentioned, or more importantly, consumed? Absolutely never. Without going into an obscene amount of boring detail here, I will leave you with two articles to check out that discuss the benefits of phytonutrients: One by Charles Poliquin and the other from Precision Nutrition.
Simply put? A wide variety of veggies with every single meal has given me clearer skin, enhanced health and a leaner body.

Speak from experience.
Of course I can’t possibly try everything on the planet in order to formulate an opinion on it, but it’s very important to me to have some personal experience with certain topics before I go spouting off my thoughts on it. Lets use Bikram Yoga for this example. Bikram is highly controversial for many different reasons. It’s done in a very hot and humid room and the safety of the postures can be questionable. I’ve practiced and taught Vinyasa yoga for years and people often ask me about my opinion on Bikram. I suppose I could have just regurgitated somebody else’s opinion on it but that seemed lame, so I signed myself up for Bikram’s 30 Day Challenge (30 sessions of Bikram in 30 days. Psycho? Yes. Fun? Oddly, yes!). This allowed me to formulate a very clear opinion on Bikram based off of personal experience, which I won’t share here since it isn’t exactly relevant. But I always find it humorous to hear people share their big grand opinions on something that they’ve never tried and really don’t know much about. Rather, they go off of other people’s experience or opinions. Most of the people I’ve heard talk about Bikram have never tried it, don’t have the slightest clue what it’s about, what the postures are for or any of the basics that I feel are necessary information. The same goes for people that are very hasty to judge Intermittent Fasting, Powerlifting, Crossfit, etc. Have you even tried it? Any of it? No? Then shushy.

Secret: I LIKE Bikram!

Be open to far fetched possibilities.
If somebody told me that I’d be knee deep (and an owner) in an Investment Banking firm two years ago I would have first asked what Investment Banking is and then I would have laughed.
The thought of my being asked to be a part of EliteFTS, the world’s #1 strength training resource in the world and a website that I stalked relentlessly for years, would never have crossed my mind.
The possibility of teaming up with 6 of the brightest shining female fitness phenoms and creating Girls Gone Strong, the female strength revolution that is taking the world by storm was never a thought. But they’ve all came to fruition and more!
These crazy events have further encouraged me to entertain my wildest dreams and if you saw the things on my Vision Map now… ohhh buddy!


My way (and your way) isn’t the only way
So you think that being a Vegan and doing yoga is the key to spiritual enlightenment, health and happiness? Congratulations.
You think that doing Crossfit 4x/week and doing Intermittent Fasting is the golden ticket to a bangin’ bod and buns of steel? Fantastic.
The examples could go on and on with Paleo, Warrior Diet, Christianity, pilates, whatever your thang may be. More so in this past year than in any other, it’s been proven to me over and over again that different things work for different people to not only help them reach their goals, but to also make them happy. And isn’t being happy the most important thing? I watch coaches beg their clients to stop running or doing yoga, but what those coaches don’t realize is that those activities may be what makes their client happy! I’d rather have a happy client doing some activity in moderation that I don’t necessarily agree with, than an unhappy client that begrudgingly does other activities and hates every second of it. There is a lot to be said about the power of our minds and our happiness and how those two influence our body and our health.
Bottom line: If something makes someone truly happy then let them do what they want and ::gasp:: be happy for them that they enjoy it so much! There isn’t only one way to do things and different things work for different people. After all, life is just one big experiment! Not one of us knows everything!

Give away money
Donate. Contribute. Tithe. Whatever you want to call it. Without diving into a bunch of detail I will just say that I’ve learned that the more money we (my husband and I) make, the more money we can give away to people that need it. I desire to make millions and millions of dollars because I want to be able to help millions and millions of people. As my father-in-law (very successful business owner, role model and mentor to both myself and Michael) always says, “It’s actually selfish for an individual to NOT want to make money. Think of all of the people that they are denying help to!” I couldn’t agree more. You can’t even turn the television on anymore without hearing of some horrible crisis that occurred and how people are desperate for financial aid.
Making more money will enable you to contribute more to charities, fundraisers, churches, your kids’ college education, your niece and nephews, your parent’s retirement home, etc etc. And something else that is interesting that I’ve learned this year? The more you give away, the more you will make. Don’t ask me how or why, but it just works out that way.
The takeaway: Money is a means, not an end, and there isn’t a damn thing wrong with desiring more of it as long as it’s for the right reasons.

People change.
This has been a tough one for me. As we evolve through life we all change a bit. Personal growth and development, experiences, new friends, knowledge, wisdom and simply growing up continually molds and shapes our persona. Some relationships that I thought would be concrete forever have started to dissipate a bit as our lives have moved into two different directions. For awhile this upset me but then I found peace in the obvious realization that “People change.” Not necessarily for the better or for the worse, but mostly just in general. I have learned to embrace this change in people. I can still love the person and cherish all of the great times and fun we had together and respect the friendship for what it was because those are the friendships and relationships that got me to where I am today!

Delivering an ass-kicking doesn’t necessarily make you a good trainer. 
There is so much more to training than just beating yourself and/or your clients to a bloody pulp. I have learned so much in fitness over the last few years that I actually look back at past techniques, or lack thereof, and cringe! Anybody can hand somebody’s ass to them on a silver platter by pulling out a stop watch and barking out exercises that will do nothing to get that person any closer to their goal. It takes a very educated trainer that can do a physical assessment and then give an exercise prescription that corresponds.

The following are things that have helped me:
– An excellent dynamic warm-up that is conducive with the activity that will follow. Hopping on the treadmill and jogging for 3-5 minutes isn’t an appropriate warm-up unless you are preparing to run!
– Mobility and stability work. Both. Now let me give a little disclaimer – mobility and stability work is not my forte, nor do I care for it to be, but I do understand it’s importance and realize there is a time and place for each. Because I plan to lift and train until I am at least 95 years old, I incorporate these two items into each and every session that I do.
– Your training doesn’t always have to be (and shouldn’t be) an ass kicker every single time.
A little tip: if you are working with a personal trainer they should be able to tell you exactly why they are having you do each exercise, and NO, general answers such as, “Because it burns calories” is not a good enough. And if it involves a BOSU ball…. well, don’t even get me started!

Take the trip.
This year has been a whirlwind of travel. I’ve been back home to Salt Lake City and Vegas 3 times each, along with Cincinnati, Baltimore and Indianapolis. We’ve taken countless road trips to Louisville, Nashville, Lexington, and Colombus. We have chosen to go to almost every event or opportunity for travel that has popped up. Why? Because again, life is short! I’d rather go and have adventures and see new things and meet new people instead of just wasting away at home doing the same old rigamarole. One day I will be old and grey and unable to travel so I may as well take advantage of fun things now. Sit home and watch tv? Pffffft. That is what TiVo is for!

Develop myself.
What a great year in books! I used to be a fiction junkie but I tossed those by the wayside and got hooked on didactic books. “The Richest Man Who Ever Lived”, “The Genie Within”, “As a Man Thinketh”, “Outliers”, “The Aladdin Factor”, and my all time favorite “The Happiness Project” are some of the books that have dominated my reading time this year. I’m going to do a little book report on each of these books, along with future reads, so I’ll be posting those soon.

Family first.
This isn’t exactly a newsflash but my family comes first. When I was younger, I admittedly traded in some family time for a more exciting lifestyle in Sin City. An awful day that I’ll never forget in March of 2010 reminded me just how important family is and how precious and fragile life can be. I’ve lived away from my family for over 7 years now and that that is about to change in 2012. Lucky for me, I’ve been welcomed into Michael’s family with open arms and I feel just as close to all of them as I do my own family. I’m not sure what I ever did to get so lucky to have such amazing in-laws that I love, respect and admire so much, but all I can do is thank God for them. In short, cherish every day with the people you love. Make the time for them, make the phone call or send them a card. Time is ticking.

Be present.

Look familiar?

We are currently in a social media craze. Everybody, including me, is on Facebook, Twitter, Linkd In, Google+, Blogger, etc. Both myself and Michael have made a concerted effort to back down our time on social media because it’s not doing a single thing to get us closer to our very ambitious goals. When you are old do you think anybody will care about how many “friends” you had? Can you imagine starting a conversation by saying, “Hey Ethel! Remember that great status update I posted??” Hell no! You’ll be reminiscing about actual experiences. The problem is, I feel like actual experiences are muddled now by people glued to their phones the entire time so they are missing out by not being present. Look around at the next dinner event and I can almost guarantee that everybody will be skimming through their phones even though they are physically with their friends or family!
And while I’m ranting about Facebook, let’s pull it together on there, shall we? It’s not exactly the appropriate platform to whine about your cheating hussy of a wife or to piss and moan about everything from Monday mornings to your hatred of the latest iPhone. Lighten up!

The wrap:
2011 rocked my world. I learned so much about business, life and myself. I feel like I’ve added to my arsenal of knowledge in both nutrition and training. I’m stronger, healthier and leaner than I’ve ever been. There are some wonderful things on the horizon and I feel blessed to have a wonderful husband and family by my side as we all forge ahead into a new year.
I look forward to seeing what this post will look like at this time next year, but I’m going to enjoy every moment getting there. Remember, days may be long but the years are short!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year dear readers! 
May your heart be full of love,
may your body be full of health, 
and may your mind be at peace!

10 Comments

  • Reply
    Naomi(Onefitfoodie)
    December 21, 2011 at 10:17 am

    Jen I LOVE this post! and find that I relate to so much of what you have learned…I too have learned many of these same things…especially "my way isn't the only way" Yes, I hate running (long distance) and think that it doesn't do a body good in the long run BUT I have clients that LOVE it and I will never tell them to give it up all together. we just have strategies for them so that they can still do things (like running) that they enjoy while maintaining balance in other areas to reach their goals…greatpost!!

  • Reply
    Jen Comas Keck
    December 21, 2011 at 10:19 am

    Juliet – Thank you so much! I'm sure as the next few days go on, I'll think of more lessons I've learned but these are the biggies for me. Thanks for reading!

    Naomi- EXACTLY! Why make a client totally give up what they love and are passionate about?! And thank you because your blog and the post you put up recently was the inspiration behind this post 😉 Love your blog!

  • Reply
    Neal Putt -Strength Max For Athletes
    December 21, 2011 at 11:11 am

    You may be young, but you are wise beyond your years. I may be twice your age, yet I am rethinking the way I look at some aspects of life after reading this. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Jen.

  • Reply
    Juliet
    December 21, 2011 at 1:16 pm

    GREAT post! Thanks for sharing these thoughts, I can relate to so many of them from this past year myself as well…

  • Reply
    Danny McLarty
    December 22, 2011 at 8:06 am

    Great messages here, Jen!

    I will say, I *mostly* agree (but maybe not completely agree) with you in regards to just letting people be when it comes to loving an exercise or program even if it we don't think it is best (i.e. Crossfit, distance running, etc). As you said, "It takes a very educated trainer that can do a physical assessment and then give an exercise prescription that corresponds."

    Much of what people out there are doing is NOT corresponding to their goals (and their long term health). And I feel as trainers it is our responsibility to help educate these people as they don't know that they don't know. As I tell my clients that love to run a lot (distance); ~ "the repetitive stress is not ideal for your joints blah, blah, blah. But if you love doing it, who am I to stop you? I just hope you consider some of these things that I am talking to you about."

    So, in the end, they *may* reduce their running volume due to my educating them. They may stop altogether and go with more joint friendly ways to get their cardio in (and end up loving this), or their love for running may trump what I advise. And that is fine, but at least they know more and are no longer in the, they don't know that they don't know, category. (running = just one example as we could go over a bunch more).

    IMO, the problem comes when people are a-holes about this stuff and don't educate in a respectful manner.

    In the end, there is a fine line between being a jerk and using our education/experience to help advise people so they can make an informed decision in their programming.

    Keep on killing it!

    Danny

  • Reply
    Jen Comas Keck
    December 22, 2011 at 3:46 pm

    Hey Danny! Thanks for the great comment. You make a fantastic point that I agree wholeheartedly with in regards to us educating our clients on what we believe is best for them. What I wrote was under the assumption that the trainer had already educated them, but I can see that I didn't convey that properly. So yes, agreed – trainers should educate clients and guide them in a way that is best suited towards their goals.
    I just get exhausted listening to some trainers belittle and berate their clients if their client refuses to give up their passion.
    I completely understand what you are saying and where you are coming from!

  • Reply
    Zach
    December 23, 2011 at 12:14 pm

    Great post, Jen! I especially liked the be present and give money. I am actually writing a post now about how I need to improve upon being present. I tend to be a workaholic and miss out on just enjoying life. Take care and happy holidays!

  • Reply
    Danny McLarty
    December 23, 2011 at 3:15 pm

    Yeah, in the situation you mentioned, that does get OLD! Glad we are on the same page. 🙂

    Danny

  • Reply
    Diane
    December 24, 2011 at 8:07 am

    Hi Jen…

    Its Diana Wright from LVAC. I honestly don't read alot of blogs posted by folks because I often times consider it just a bunch of rambling as a result of my "self-assessed ADD". However, I'm currently recovering from my 5th surgery in the past year and am up late and just happened to come across your blog. Just want to say "great post"! You have come a LONG way and have grown considerably since you left Vegas, and are continuing to grow in a very beautiful & positive light. Stay encouraged, continue to reach for the impossible, and God bless you & Michael…

    Diana

  • Reply
    Tony Tomra
    January 1, 2012 at 11:48 am

    thanks great post and also thanks for all your thoughts and training that you post through out the year. Happy New Year

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