I have an embarrassing confession to make but let me preface this story by saying I am not proud of myself.
A cataclysmic meltdown, if you will, over something as silly and trivial as my measurements. Let me back up and explain. I’ve been working diligently and successfully with a phenomenal nutrition coach to enhance my health, decrease bodyfat, increase muscle mass, keep myself accountable, and improve my strength. Everything has been sailing along smoothly until last week when all [emotional] hell broke loose.
Every other Friday morning means it’s time for me to take skinfolds and measurements (we don’t use the scale to track progress and haven’t in about 4 months) and send them off to The Boss. My skinfolds have, to my delight, been steadily decreasing and this past Friday they had decreased again. Great right? Right! But ::dramatic pause:: two of my girth measurements have slightly increased. Seeing this threw me into a livid rage of fury*. What? I thought. Increased?? Impossible!
Time out. Let’s review the playback tapes, shall we?
In the last 6 months, all of my lifts have wildly increased. I’ve hit huge PRs; a bench of 155, a deadlift of 315, and multiple sets of unassisted chin-ups. Could this small girth increase be… oh, I dunno – MUSCLE gain perhaps? After all, I strength train like a banshee 4 times per week and make it very known how much I love high volume training routines.
On top of decreased bodyfat and increased strength, last month’s blood panel report received a gold star and a pat on the back from my functional doctor. I’ve gotten leaner, stronger, and healthier, but because two of my tape measurements have increased a bit, which is undoubtedly the glorious bi-product of hard work, I’m going to discount all of the collective progress I’ve made?!
- First off, I don’t need to lose bodyfat; rather I choose to lose bodyfat because I like the esthetic of a very lean and muscular body. Losing bodyfat when you don’t necessarily need to (or hell, even when you do need to) is a bitch, especially scraping off the last little bits.
- While I want to be stronger without gaining an ounce of muscle, this is not likely. While I don’t think I’ll transform into the Hulk before your own eyes, a little bit of hypertrophy here or there shouldn’t be this surprising, especially given the way I train. Would I rather gain a bit of muscle after I lose a bit more bodyfat? Well, sure! But unfortunately our bodies don’t necessarily keep track of stuff like that and while you can guide it, it’s going to do what it wants to do to a degree.
- Carter said something to me that really stuck with me. “You have to take pride in and feel fully rewarded by the sense that you’re doing everything you can to reach your stated goal – the means need also be appreciated as a worthy end with any actual change being a bonus.” Basically, I need to find peace in the fact that I’m doing my absolute best to get to where I want to be, and take pride in my hard work.
- Every body is different. Just because some of my friend’s can eat Lara Bars and ice cream and stay lean does not, by any stretch of the imagination, mean that I can do the same. Different measures must be taken for different people to reach similar goals. I struggled with this for a bit, but have relinquished to the fact that what I’m doing works for me, and I need to trust the process. If that means packing tupperwares around and eating my 3 meals per day instead of some people’s 5x/day or 1x/day for the Intermittent Fasters, then so be it!
- And last, but certainly not least, I need to celebrate my success so far. Celebrate the fact that I’m stronger, happier, and leaner. Celebrate the fact that I’m blessed with good health and a lifestyle that I relish. Celebrate that I have the opportunity to work with an amazing coach and train at a wonderful gym. Celebrate the fact that I’m a part of an amazing group of women that is paving the way for a stronger future for women. Celebrate the fact that I have wonderful clients that are all making amazing progress, and celebrate the fact that I get to be a role model.
Puts it into perspective, doesn’t it? It sure did for me!
Drop me a line below!
22 Comments
AcanthusNichole
April 17, 2012 at 1:19 pmGreat post Jen! It's easy for those of us who are starting out to feel like more advanced people have no frustrations or stress about their progress or that their/your stalling or setbacks are nothing compared to ours, since you're always in such good shape anyways.
I can definitely see how much MORE difficult and frustrating it can be at an advanced level to try and shave off more and cut back more when you're being so good to begin with.
You're doing awesome though and way to inspire! xo
bearbonesstrength
April 17, 2012 at 1:19 pmExcellent post. I sometimes let my preconceived thoughts/results get in the way of going with the flow and letting my body/training do what it does.
Heidi
April 17, 2012 at 1:19 pmLove the post!
Heather
April 17, 2012 at 1:32 pmGreat post! So many great points! Always need reminders to keep things in perspective!
erin
April 17, 2012 at 1:49 pmgreat post jen, and right on the mark! it's so easy to discount the things we HAVE accomplished, and easy to focus on the areas we feel we fall short in (stupid bench days!!) it's funny, i follow a different program from 90% of my fellow gym goers, and i used to think, maybe i should be doing that weird move on the power plate, or throwing sandbags, perhaps they are losing more weight than i will…but then i snap back into reality: what works for me is doing what i am, and it's kind of nice hearing the praise from those throwing the sandbags on how impressive my little legs are to deadlift 245lbs 5 times :)….keep kicking ass and taking names!! i for one am proud to have you as my coach…february will be here before i know it 😉
Bret Contreras
April 17, 2012 at 2:02 pmNever saw your 315lb deadlift PR Jen. Awesome!!!
Jen Comas Keck
April 17, 2012 at 2:44 pmThanks for reading Heidi!
Jen Comas Keck
April 17, 2012 at 2:46 pmI'm so incredibly guilty of this. I have wasted too much time focusing my energy on what I think my body should be doing or how it should be responding! Now I am redirecting my focus on staying on track, working hard and enjoying the results that come from it, regardless of how they may show up!
Jen Comas Keck
April 17, 2012 at 2:47 pmThanks Nic!
I certainly have my frustrations, setbacks and ups & downs. A goal with my writing is to be more transparent because I know other people can relate to stories like this. That way we can get through them together and learn from each other! 🙂
Jen Comas Keck
April 17, 2012 at 2:48 pmThank you! I needed a little slap across the face to get my head on straight again!
Jen Comas Keck
April 17, 2012 at 2:51 pmThanks Erin!
I completely understand what you mean about throwing sandbags! I keep seeing other people's nutrition plans and wondering, "Should I be doing that? Would that be more effective for me?" when the truth is that I'm getting killer results when I'm focused on myself and NOT what others are doing! I think I've finally learned that lesson for the final time 😉
Thanks for the kind words and I'm excited to hear about your upcoming meet!
Jen Comas Keck
April 17, 2012 at 2:51 pmThank ya sir! I swore I'd pull that before the end of the year last year and I managed to get it done with about 3 days to go! Woohoo!
Marci
April 17, 2012 at 3:29 pmI can relate to this 110%. I am the ultimate perfectionist, and no matter how hard I work, I constantly feel like I am never strong enough, muscular enough, lean enough etc. Unfortunately, this need to always be better than the day before has gotten me into some trouble over the years. Unlike you, I didnt get that gold star after my most recent visit with my functional doc, and therefor I have to make some serious decisions as to whether or not keeping up with the strictness of my lifestyle is really worth it in the end. I tend to forget how far Ive come on this journey of health and fitness, but Im still always wanting and pushing for more. Despite knowing the ramifications of what I put myself through to achieve my goals, I often just dont know how to back off.
Thank you for your transparency with this. I so enjoy reading your blog, as I always take away something useful from your posts. This one was proved to be a very timely wake up call. Keep up all the great work!
Emy Barkhimer
April 18, 2012 at 10:28 amYes. I get the camera out, start snapping pictures, and post them for all to see that even though the scale said I gained 6 pounds, I still looked lean and strong.
Great article, Jen.
Cookie
April 18, 2012 at 10:51 amWhenever I have a momentary lapse of sanity regarding my fitness, I pull out the old before pic to remind myself that I busted my own butt to drop 110+ pounds. Then I remind myself that I am doing this because I love it, and my love for it is the reason for my constant impovement, including growth. Just had the same issue Jen, re: my waist size. Whole midsection looks awesome, however, the stupid number on the tape had me thinking that I may need to lay off the deadlifts for a while to avoid further "growth in the area", but after a quick email chat with a beautiful badass, I came back to my senses. New PR is expected on Friday 🙂
Jen Comas Keck
April 18, 2012 at 11:23 amHi Marci!
What you are dealing with is a very different side of this and I appreciate the different perspective you have offered! Finding balance has never been a strength of mine and it's something that has sat on my New Year's Resolution list for at least the last 6 years: "Find Balance". Needless to say, I'm still searching. 😉
I hope you are able to find balance between a physique and lifestyle that you love!
Thank you for the kind words and for taking the time to read!
Jen Comas Keck
April 18, 2012 at 11:25 amNow THAT is strength, my friend! Wow! I admire, and envy, your gumption!
But you know what? We DO look lean and strong so to hell with the measuring tape (or scale)!
Thanks for taking the time to post!
Jen Comas Keck
April 18, 2012 at 11:27 amWow, 110 pounds! That is amazing – congratulations!
And reminding myself that I love this is a great idea, because I really do! Thank you for a great tip, and good luck on your new PR on Friday!
Cookie
April 20, 2012 at 10:00 amYAY! Hit the PR! not as fancy as yours 😉 BUT still proud of myself, especially since I was worried that last weeks vegan fast and week off from lifting would really make all my lifts suffer! Feel like a million bucks today!
Jen Comas Keck
April 20, 2012 at 1:56 pmYeaaaah! That is great to hear! And often a deload week can do wonders for us mentally, as well as physically! I'm happy for you!
MarissaLauren
April 25, 2012 at 6:17 amI'm glad to know I am not the only one who goes through this. Thanks for writing and sharing, I really needed to read this today.
Jen Comas Keck
April 25, 2012 at 10:41 amHi Marissa!
I'm so glad that this resonated with you. We all need to take a deep breath, focus on the many positives and cut ourselves some slack! 🙂
Have a great day!